There's nothing I can do I won't stop yearning for you Though if you see me now I could be mistaken for anyone They'll just let me lie hear Have to make my mark but can't seem to trace it dark Like everything wants me to When will judgement come I cannot know But I feel it in the crisp way the wind blows All around your snowy face Will I ever see you smile honey? Old flames Trying to drain me of the love I had No one ever wants to see it plainly But I think that's mainly Well and good

When it all closed in You were there for me I'd tell it to wait But then you'll see There's nothing on my mind That's the problem You have your own strife I can't solve it Though I'd kill myself to try I'd fly you through hell eternal to touch the blue sky I'd love to be beside you And I don't know why No, I don't why Don't know why There's nothing on my mind And that's the problem You have your own strife I can't solve it Though I'd kill myself to try Kill myself to try Kill myself to try Will you just take my hand, far off as I am And swear that you'll be there as long as we shall live Please be the thought that Spreads my ashes across the sea

Maybe I'll go downstairs I got dressed today And ate something Tipped the delivery man extra Small scale battles 10,000 to 1 Magnified every second By the unseen hand of the black dog of the hood of Satan I keep the gray at bay Just barely By going where I am now Cool glass Cold tea Some fruit in there Maybe sugar The man behind the counter asks me "what are you studying?" I tell him maybe political science And afterwards I realize What some people do every day is now something to grapple with As the last loop tightens high above the square There is no spectacle here

You store your emotional data without a key or any sort of system What you keep and what you will discard Must be nice to be off your mind No insecurities, disabilities, or extra weight to lug around Peaches with a man who's firm and secure in himself Someone you'd indulge under the covers Till your duties called I'm the paper cone you tossed out Filled with nothing And longing to complete what it set out to do Holding everything just so Teetering on the tightrope of love Your touch is the bucket Not even big enough for a Looney Tunes gag Go Make my doom as comfortable as you can Plead ignorance Sit on your throne The world in your Grasp You danced on the platter Impervious to regret O Herodius give me your hand So I may descend Forgetting those who will wait for me To rise in the coming time

You came again Not that I expect or enjoy your visits That purple vestment shrouding your body's majesty Yes Grace Something people do without thinking You can't feel it But you know it's there Like when you smile at me Which would try to turn my thoughts back a couple years When none of this was any concern, and we were all gliding on thin, pure, lovely air and the flowers breathed and they still made plastics Now all the lilacs are burned and the plastics are melted The air is thick and heavy with nothing I saw an eclipse yesterday In the mold for a million generations So I guess everything's still turning I'm the only one here I believe it, but it won't bring anything back

There's a strange coincidence I'm watching her now A substitute for chain restaurants And dark-lit gyration Can you choke the feelings out of me? I won't have to endure your smile Or the slivers of your eyes So, so kind Every smirk, every grin, every toss of your hair A little thing is all I need Nothing is there Why do I expect you to clean my stinking feet? Ain't it enough you've passed me by And I'm so far from your Relief? I never rode a bicycle Never fixed a chair Burden hard on the shoulders Too bad, I put it there Don't run your fingers through my smooth lines Just pay your respects and leave When the world drops Far, far behind Time There's no time left for me

Going down the road Where the grasses wave so slow And the stones Littered like pinecones Sun don't understand my sorrow Oh no Oh no Oh no My grandfather was a good man Sweat and the stiff chemicals Bleached white shirts Couldn't stop him from gasping at the end But he hung on the ninety years Hard work by his side My great uncle was a good man Took three shots in the leg Bending those Krauts back Oh, even he wasn't immune to nature's way Hope he has his rest Sitting at the graves Thinking of the preacher's cross Having done nothing to get up to where their at No Can't do nothing to get up there Up to heaven, up to the Lord, up to salvation no I have my talents, my many skills Couldn't get a sentence in edgewise Overdosed and stared like a fool when she blew by Help the poor wretch Help the poor wretch Help the poor wretch Going to see my baby My lovely dearest friend She had a thing with an officer, her perfect gentleman Told her what he was gonna do Without sounding too mean or too cruel Quick shove and she'd thank him Withholding just for the sacred act Tell you what I'm gonna do The whistle so piercing The arches shining so clean I won't accept his offering Passion straight through the eyes And into the head Badge won't be gleaming no more Lord don't be listening to the figure in your sight Cheeks red with hatred Evil flowing in the vein Tell everything and everyone redemption means nothing And my poor father I ask this, my poor father Forgive me If you can

(lyrics were improvised on the spot, so that is why I'm not writing them down here)

Can't sleep tonight Pondering those angel eyes They've cried so much Blotting out the fantasy I had in mind Don't have the time Yet I create these things as I move along Love can be strong If you're pulling the strings yourself When it all goes When it all goes down Everything's dark I dream of you serving me Waitress on the side, some fake romance, please! A token of shared company My mind was lucid It said: "go in for the kill" It's much worse when I'm awake The pictures get me my fill When I dream, I relax and picture Piercing icicle eyes One pair too young One too occupied For a vapid, toothless smile They've borne more in this life Than I could even touch Blink, now they're gone Don't think too much

Saw your picture The one where you held him like it was middle school Everything was just too perfect to be true Why am I sitting here Blasting music few care about Hearing your siren call While humming strings ensnare my soul Woah (Chorus): Somewhere, I'm a big star Doing something with everything Instead of turning into the nothing I wasn't dealt Oh no I can see now why you drifted Never wanted to carry my silly little distractions In the post office that never got its due How did I expect this to come through? When I blew my chance And it all stuck to us like glue? (Chorus): The hound in your heart has lost its teeth Everyone's like that when they meet their match Those feelings for each other are beyond belief When the happy young mastiff finally finds his queen Just frolic in your grass God gives you that right But finding love is fruitless When I can't do myself right No

You saw right through me The cracked clay in the kiln And I love how you fit me into your life But for all those nights we broke bread together I saw that you'd leave me Bring out the compliments Are you perfect? No. But you're straight good enough And I didn't care who you wanted to fuck Oh, alI needed, I just needed someone To give the strange state of Connecticut A good name A beautiful space For romance to retire so I'd be free But that 860 Such a devilish number What it gave me Was a newly jealous soul And not a place to be Well I drone on Covering you with honey No bees or maggots are drawn to it, you see For you are strong enough To repel them I just wish you'd give that power of confidence To me You see, I'm lazy Not like your new man Or anyone that pleased you anytime at all I thought kissing your toes was the way, now I know Severins, they have to be Caesars, How sad of him, he can't even see her (X2) I just needed someone Who'd give the strange state of Connecticut A good name A beautiful space For romance to retire so I'd be free But that 860 Such a devilish number What it gave me was a newly jealous soul And not a place To be

It's difficult to process I stay in my shell And it would've worked But for that last outburst Coughing back Sadness kept From the dawn of the moment Yiayia's cold feet Beckoned me to The clear precipice before me It all happens they say well That's for sure But there's still something Unnatural In the way your thoughts drift And your voice slips Into the sands of the past So I try to remember all the happy times Cucumber sandwiches and the corned beef that I grew to love You were always there Pure of heart and full of care Three mothers is too much How can I touch what he built on the back of fire and destruction? Many of my family Cut down at different times What is it that they entrusted to me?

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I am the first To hold you My two cold hands He comes Bearing gifts Clothed in glittered rags Carrying Promises And a mouthful of bricks To bury us His little finger suspends the world Defying the laws of gravity and motion While the sea boils in its stead While the sea boils in its stead I am the lowest of man Having made no sacrifice The new death will be long Three hundred nails our victims' song The rest they grab and pillage Voices shattered Democracy overthrown Now the dragon comes With false emerald city Opening After its wrath Exalted spices Turned inward Toward Babylon And three-thirds of the nation Is blown out In our ignorance Glory be Glory be

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You are my salvation Close the door and turn out the light I have no transportation If I did, things wouldn't turn out right Meeting fantasies in cheap hotels Dim lights, starchy sheets, white tubes, and the rest of it Searching for some stability Or the later half of a fairy tale That never even starts I saw them there on an eastbound train Inching to the destination without a name Make it to the flag stop and we'll get on Till there's nothing left Met this woman called her beautiful She had so much pride Wore her heart on her sleeve, had nothing to hide Except the time she sobbed When her two babies cried Wish I was there for her But I'm just a coward my friend Never want to stare love in the face No matter how long its' been Love a girl, she has big green eyes A bird that left her and rough family ties I would love her but you see I can't fly To save her in time So instead, she sits at home and dies Never realizing she created her own lies This lovely swinger, they like it rough Stuffing panties into their subs' gaping mouths I would let them enter me As easy as the sparrow and the bee But I can't break free From this body, my brain, or my soul As sure as the diamonds turn to dirty coal, yeah I saw them there on an eastbound train Inching to their destination without a name Make it to the flag stop and we'll get off Looks like there's nothing left

Hand me my ticket, I'm going away Haven't got no money for a place to stay Street's warm enough At least for today Got a girl in Hamilton If I turned up She wouldn't wanna see me none Didn't come up that August Cut her off and went my way Pretty face, panting in the distance Moaning blackout blues babe Blackout blues Well the whistle's my only friend Past the grass and ferns Plenty of space to lay my head But not enough to escape the evening No

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Gray light filters through the curtains And I'm left making plans Useless recommendations For what you might do in town The harbor's nice this time of year Since all the snow has melted away And the modern art museum has plenty of space For you to stand around and think I never liked Baltimore myself Pretty but uninteresting, not much to stay for I remember when we used to talk How crazy your mother was It would seem Greeks are the same as Poles Or maybe we were just different enough to connect You love the people around you Answering the call all day Doing the public service That everybody says they shouldn't take Chorus: But we live in a land of sinners Everyone tries to make up ground For things we've done wrong Some moments are best left forgotten But they're not the ones you can run away from The shadow of the arch Hangs heavy on you tonight The vodka in your water The stretch marks of your false love Will your children be told of The lovely person now buried Before you can revive it yourself? Chorus 2 We live in a land of sinners Everyone tries to make up ground For things we've done wrong Some moments are best left forgotten But they're not the ones you can run away from Though I try, I'm no saint myself Words and images to strangers are testament to that I love indiscriminately, foolishly Clinging to any false hope in return But I was true when I said I loved you From the moment that we first spoke And I wish I could stop your trembling hands from fashioning a noose out of such precious rope I will help you always Stupid as it may sound Your honesty, kindness and beauty Are a few of the reasons I'm still around Chorus 3: I will guide you through the land of sinners Everyone tries to make up ground For things we've done wrong Some moments are best left forgotten But those aren't the ones that you should run from

No crack of light in the doorway Solid as it should be That scene with the razors has me in some misery Thirteen Reasons Why isn't enough to kill yourself So why did I take that idea off the shelf again? It wasn't because I couldn't find any friend Here or else I'd be gone long before April rain had passed on Perhaps it was this calling This stirring in my soul Where you don't know where it all is organized anymore And you have a God you truly fear but are afraid to know Still, pills are a silly way to go The only painless way they gave my aunt not long before She slipped into a beach with her husband on another world Morphine only eases so much And Dr. Death had his own contraption We're not barbaric anymore We only prefer To see blood floating through the remnants of a character we never new Or some gunshot to be heard in the news. Made for television blues Well I can tell you It's a miracle we don't all collapse where we stand If all of us gave out secrets To every single person that we ever had

Feeling better today Though it's cold in here Maybe I'm just sick Need some electrotherapy To stun me back into emotional depth I lost track of who I was Without purpose We all float Rhyme and reason Have no meaning There's nothing to hold onto When you're staring at the wall Will I try to put myself into A profession for my attention Or will I paint the counters with chow mein Finding a woman is like finding a vein In a heroin addict Uncollapsed and free Like the summer rain I might grow old like George Bell Lonely ex reservist in a cramped apartment Searching for the strapping young lad he once was Just two letters to memorialize the absence of a fallen soldier From an old flame who could bare his name Bury me with some regards From the two women who filled my heart with song And from one who ran through it with a spear They may not remember who I was to them But maybe some of their love and kindness Can remind my bones of what it was like to be a friend

3 2 1 When I heard you sing My soul filled with light And all of my worries floated like some fluttering kite On a sunny day The angels don't know what to do with you Your beauty shocks them to their souls And I can't imagine why you'd talk to me at all Maybe it's a short sale Of all the collateral that I owe A worthless transaction Like those disembodied voices over the phone But if it was all ripped away Like Burgess Meredith in an old gray hellscape I will hold the beauty in your voice As a sword against everything that I hate I feel it coming The ships are on their way Fulfilling the debt humanity has to pay Wounded Knee, Nagasaki, The Somme, Ottoman Turkey If we can learn nothing from this Then raise your chant Your prayer of peace

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I'm no good at intimacy When I pressed she drew away from me Without an embrace to help the blow Why'd she have to go? Oh you gave me all you had All I can say is sorry My mind can't go of the dream Sitting on your beat-up couch Watching the smoke rise Counting our good luck Before it passed us by Love's cheap nowadays And kindness is in short supply So aim your beam right between my eyes Stay, my Boston light If the walls could talk they'd say David rose above us To hold a beautiful witch With a Christian heart You almost thought feelings were less than nothing But then he came and you showed each other How to fall Love's cheap nowadays And kindness is in short supply Speak to me and I shall be released Shine on, my Boston light

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I have good days But the nights are tough Like on this one, I'm watching old commercials Killer cereal clowns and astronauts drinking Orange-flavored Tang Went to a restaurant tonight To hear a set Few of my friends playing some folk-rock To a bar of unrelenting faces I had some fried chicken And a bourbon Muddled orange and cherry It was pretty good And the guitars they barely carried But I love seeing the friends who put so much stock in my musical endeavors Still floored that they could I started from nothing And look where I am Just goes to show, when in doubt, lend a hand A friend was gonna go with me But she had to head home This girl is the kindest I've met while on my own She likes weird videos and Cat Stevens on the rafio Blinding red hair, beautiful eyes, sometimes big glasses This weekend we're gonna cuddle And watch Twin Peaks you know She's a genuine soul and I love that about her So rare to find Just like kindness shows Everything will circle back around And help you always In good time

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